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Whatever we do, we want a return. We are all traders.

11:31 Z5Prf4 In the same way Reshebnik-po-fizike-otvety-na-kontrolnye-voprosy-9-klass-10. 13:29 @ Unsuccessful topic on the forum successful ololo.://telegra.ph/Russkij-yazyk-3-klass-silnova-kanevskaya-olejnik-2013-reshebnik-10-28.

We are traders in life, we are traders in virtue, we are traders in religion. We are also traders in love. If you come to trade, if it is a question of give-and-take, if it is a question of buy-and-sell, abide by the laws of buying and selling. There is a bad time and there is a good time; there is a rise and a fall in prices: always expect the blow to come.

It is like looking at the mirror. Your face is reflected: you make a grimace — there is one in the mirror; if you laugh, the mirror laughs. This is buying and selling, giving and taking. We get caught. Not by what we give, but by what we expect.

We get misery in return for our love; not from the fact that we love, but from the fact that we want love in return. There is no misery where there is no want.

Desire, want, is the father of all misery. Desires are bound by the laws of success and failure. Desires must bring misery. The great secret of true success, of true happiness, then, is this: the man who asks for no return, the perfectly unselfish man, is the most successful. It seems to be a paradox. Do we not know that every man who is unselfish in life gets cheated, gets hurt?

Apparently, yes. 'Christ was unselfish, and yet he was crucified.' True, but we know that his unselfishness is the reason, the cause of a great victory — the crowning of millions upon millions of lives with the blessings of true success. Swami Vivekananda in '. Is it really about not having any expectations? Expectations are intrinsic to human beings, it is the fabric of us.

For generations we have been hearing about unselfishness or no expectations. I have not come across anyone personally. REad about a few but I haven't lived with them to really authenticate what I have read. I am realising and understanding now that the place of contentment is to able to identify what the other (matter of life) is capable of giving/delivering and then aligning one's expectation.

Easier said than done, but not impossible. When I do something expecting a certain outcome,more often than not i end up feeling disappointed. Even when the outcome is achieved the joy is short lived and doubt sets in, 'could it have been better, if I had done this that or the other?' There is no answer to this hypothetical question although an endless debate may ensue.

On the other hand when I do something because ' that is the way I am'I am always happy and stress free. The results take care of themselves. They are dependent anyway on many factors other than my effort. I don't know whether this is selfish or unselfish. That would depend on how one defines self. I have been thinking about this exactly this subject the past few days.

Coincidentally I spent the weekend at a tribal interaction center which is setup by a follower of Swami Vivekananda, and just this morning, I saw a link on a friends FB page that was part of a speech Swami Vivekananda made in Chicago at the turn of last century. Today I received this in my inbox as an answer to the questions I've been asking myself. Fortunately, it came when I was about to do something that would be very hurtful to someone I love.

Am going to attempt to put aside expectation this time and next time and the next. Constant consciousness is the only way it will work. I thank you for bringing this to me today! A favorite quote of mine is Sheldon Kopp's 'I only get to keep that which I am prepared to give up.

In Western terms, Virtue is its own reward. There is no hope of redemption in doing Good in order to be saved.

Only by doing Good for its own sake, without seeking reward, can we attain Salvation.' Vivekananda is right that we get caught by expectation. The challenge is to give or do because that is what I want to give or do, not to get something in return, which, of course, is manipulation. Vivekananda is incorrect in suggesting that every person who is unselfish gets cheated, gets hurt.

It could happen, of course -- there's never a guarantee of outcome. But the outcome is not the thing to focus on -- if the giving is pure, is without expectation, the satisfaction/joy is in the giving -- anything more is bonus. Perhaps the most meaningful statement I have ever heard is reduce, and /or eliminate desire. When I first heard it I wondered why the one who said it desired to tell others. I later found that when we are all one, that particular part of the one was expressing his experience. His experience has been very useful for me although I still desire not to desire which, of course, is a desire.